Who are the grown ups? I've never been sure. Not sure if I am one, although technically, I know I am. Not sure about high school kids. Some are close to being grown up, some are not. People approaching 30 sometimes like to think they aren't really grown ups. And then I have known older people than me, who have started to act not very grown up.
I am one of those people who tries super hard to think before she speaks, I mean, I try really hard. My dad is so good at it. But after almost 50 years under my belt of being verbal, I still say the wrong things at the wrong times. In fact, I feel like I do it more often than most. The worst thing is when you hurt someone that you love. Usually, I can come up with a reason that the incorrect words have flown out of my mouth. I am exhausted, I am uptight, I am unhappy about something -- call me the queen of excuses. But words can't be taken back.
Even if it was my opinion on any given day, it doesn't mean I meant it from the depth of my soul. It doesn't matter, words can't be taken back. I am old enough to know better. People have spoken wrongly of me, and it made me mad. People have spoken their mind, and it has hurt my feelings. Have you heard that saying, "Be kind to everyone, because everyone is battling something"? I'm pretty sure I have done it again. I didn't think long enough before I spoke.
Knowing that I have this tendency, I try to make forgiveness one of the things I do best. It is a priority for me to try and give people every chance in the world to play nice. My fear of knowing how much forgiveness I need and will always need, is what fuels me to forgive others. I don't do it expecting them to forgive me, although I hope they will, but I do it because I believe it is right and moral. I am somewhat forgetful. I believe that is God helping me with my forgiveness-ness, so I don't harbor ill will or cruel thoughts. Another thing that I believe is that if I want and need forgiveness, I have to show it to others. Although I am kind of paying it forward, I can't go back and fix the mess I made. I was abrupt, and I spoke out of turn. No one asked me what I thought, but I regurgitated my thoughts of the moment, and I deeply regret it. Fixable? I hope so.
I am one of those people who tries super hard to think before she speaks, I mean, I try really hard. My dad is so good at it. But after almost 50 years under my belt of being verbal, I still say the wrong things at the wrong times. In fact, I feel like I do it more often than most. The worst thing is when you hurt someone that you love. Usually, I can come up with a reason that the incorrect words have flown out of my mouth. I am exhausted, I am uptight, I am unhappy about something -- call me the queen of excuses. But words can't be taken back.
Even if it was my opinion on any given day, it doesn't mean I meant it from the depth of my soul. It doesn't matter, words can't be taken back. I am old enough to know better. People have spoken wrongly of me, and it made me mad. People have spoken their mind, and it has hurt my feelings. Have you heard that saying, "Be kind to everyone, because everyone is battling something"? I'm pretty sure I have done it again. I didn't think long enough before I spoke.
Knowing that I have this tendency, I try to make forgiveness one of the things I do best. It is a priority for me to try and give people every chance in the world to play nice. My fear of knowing how much forgiveness I need and will always need, is what fuels me to forgive others. I don't do it expecting them to forgive me, although I hope they will, but I do it because I believe it is right and moral. I am somewhat forgetful. I believe that is God helping me with my forgiveness-ness, so I don't harbor ill will or cruel thoughts. Another thing that I believe is that if I want and need forgiveness, I have to show it to others. Although I am kind of paying it forward, I can't go back and fix the mess I made. I was abrupt, and I spoke out of turn. No one asked me what I thought, but I regurgitated my thoughts of the moment, and I deeply regret it. Fixable? I hope so.
